Tongue In Cheek Tuesday; Dii would tell me

If you're lucky, you've got one.  The one friend who tells things to 'ya just like it is.

This Tongue in Cheek Tuesday post is dedicated to my one friend who knows about this blog (hi Dii!) and she tells it to me just like it is. 

Dii actually reads my blog and I never even threatened her.  I "hey girl'd" her husband without asking, what a friend I am.  At the end of this week I've reserved a day to hit some garage sales with her.  IF it doesn't snow.  Yes, really.  Snow.  In April.

{source}

Dii has a daughter who collects owls.    

I don't know if the one above is the exact owl purse Dii saw, I just remember it was a pricey little bird, the well over $100 green backs kinda pricey.

A lot more than she was going to spend feeding her daughters owl addiction.

So Dii decided she would make one herself.  Guess she is a wise old owl.

Dii's owl purse knock off

I asked for a picture so I could see how it turned out.  She collected some of the bling on it from garage sales.  Her daughter loved the purse and I'd say it's a pretty good knock off for a lot less $$.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, like I was saying, Dii tells it to me like it is.  I have known her for 34 years, well before babies and husbands.

For April's Tongue in Cheek Tuesday I'm suppose to poke fun at how I look in what I wear around the house.  I'm pretty sure my family would think I went insane if I suddenly asked them to snap pictures of me wearing stuff I usually run and hide from the camera in.  Opps - forgot it's tongue in cheek, so... I mean I usually look like a million bucks in my high fashion hausfrau look.

So back to Dii.

On our last jaunt to Good Will Dii said to me with a bit of a chuckle;

"your profile picture really doesn't look anything like you".

.....I happen to like that sidebar picture!  

Unlike this one taken the same day wearing my who-gives-a-rats-behinder look. A few mothers are now thanking their son's for not marrying this crabby looking woman.

When I make this expression I know exactly what I'm thinking.  Idiot. 

The worst part is, I'm looking in the mirror at myself taking this photo.  Idiot.
And trim your bangs.
 

So Dii, just for you, some Bliss Paper Dolls so you can pick the look you like, let me know what face really looks like me and that's the one I'll put on my sidebar.

I wear this shirt till it's not white anymore.  Chalk paint and stain splatters add character.  Then I get mad at myself because I wore white to paint and stain.

How I think I look in that sweatshirt.

I probably look more white and hairy like this:  Dii would tell me if I did.

If I'm not wearing white, or black formal attire around the house, I'm in some form of jammies or clothes I pretend are jammies because I sleep in them. 

What's not to love about my pink-ish robe ensemble?  Does this look like me Dii?  I wear this alot to work around the house, maybe I'll wear it to garage sales with you.

When I wear jammies to wax a project this is how I think I look in pink.

And this is how I probably look.

I really thought next time Dii and I got together coats and scarf's would not be necessary but there is a snow storm heading our way tonight.

April 22nd, 2013.... 4 - 8 inches on the way.

(Seriously Bliss trim your bangs.  How come Dii never tells it to me like it is about my bangs?)  Dii please tell me this last one on my way out the door looks like me?  Because unless I trim my bangs before I see you this is what I will look like at the end of the week.

Now it's everyone's turn to link up what you wear while you hang out around the house.  Have some fun, make me laugh.  If you need a great example of tongue in cheek, check out this post from last month's party by MissFlibbertigibbet.  She nailed it, hands down the best tongue in cheek post.  Tongue in cheek isn't really suppose to be true, and I'm not so good at it, I have Pinocchio complex - the fear of my nose growing from telling lies.  But maybe I really do look like that girl in the pink when I wax projects?

Visit the other ladies of Haute Couture at:

   Silo Hill Farm

Kirb Appeal

Mellywood's Mansion

Simply Vintageous by Suzan

Linked up to WhileWearingHeals for the 'this is me' party, because I took every single one of these photos of my head either on the timer or through the mirror.  And I never in a million years thought I would be linking them anywhere!

Heard of Blogger Homes or Looksi Square?

Have you heard of the web site Blogger Homes?  How about Looksi Square?  Well if you pop over to either of those places  you will see a couple of Bliss Ranch features.

At Blogger Homes my guest bathroom is making an appearance.  I knew I should have dusted, and a good blogger would of had some before photos.  If you look up bad blogger in the Blogging dictionary, my face is there.  So close your eyes and picture pine that had yellowed, a brass faucet and a hammered brass sink.  Dean and Shannon are the bloggers at AKA Design as well as Blogger Homes.

Then there is Looksi Square.  I haven't even completely figured out face book yet, so I won't lie and say I am a Looksi guru.  But Julie @ RedHeadCanDecorate is a Looksi Ambassador and is taking over the site for a day and asked if she could feature my Kodak dresser.  I happen to like that dresser myself, so sharing it with new folks was a no brainer.

Also, in other news.....next week is time for the April edition of Tongue In Cheek Tuesday.  The theme this month to poke fun at ourselves is "Total Couture Tuesday" and there's lots of room for making fun of myself when it comes to my wardrobe.  What does Bliss really wear as she types a blog post or paints?  It will be blatantly obvious that I am NOT a fashionista. 

If you want to join in, (and we hope you will) just snap a picture of your oh-so-casual "haute couture", write a post making fun of yourself, and link it up here or on any of the blogs listed.  There are no special rules or anything.  We just like to make fun of ourselves and be entertained by your humor.
  

Pine Cabinet Door Gift

A name is a gift.

A last name as well as a first. 

Many of us as married women have a last name we didn't grow up with. 

I like my married name, and I liked my maiden name.  Our youngest son has my maiden name as his middle name.  I wanted it to be passed on somehow.

Our first born, #1 son who leads my gaggle of six offspring in age, celebrated a birthday and I wanted to make something for him.

Last minute of course because I seem to be operating that way lately.

He recently gave himself an office in his home.  He carved out a useful space in what was their nursery.

He made himself a desk...... aged the boards, sized it for his space, and gave it a patina to match a locked cabinet that his dad made for him.  (His dad - my husband - in case there was question who he belonged too!).

The antique dresser in the background is all that remains of the former nursery.  The dresser was converted out of being a changing table and might be coming to reside at my house.

#1 son built some shelves, giving them round bolt head details on the corners.  And without asking him or my daughter in law I took photos.

I tried not to capture the big suitcase in the corner packed with swim suits for the Florida vacation they were leaving on.

I must be every woman's mother-in-law nighmare huh?  Show up with my camera intruding on their life, all so I could show you how the sign I made will fit in with it's surroundings. 

#1 has turned into quite the DIY'er.  Of course he knows where to go for help and questions, his dad can build anything.

This cabinet is made out of all sorts of cast off junk wood laying around in Brawns half of the garage.  My half of course is covered only in treasures from garage sales.

I kindly asked Brawn if he would find me an old cabinet door in his junk.  No problem - he gave me three dirty choices to pick from.

I started painting and layering colors, thinking to myself, "how it ends up it ends up".

My regular readers know I have a lot of sample size pots of just about every brand of chalk or clay paint made, and I mix them all on projects.  The different brands get along quite well in my opinion.

This particular project happened to use all CeCe Caldwells paint and wax.

I mentioned this was last minute.

I started the project 3 hours before I needed to gift it.  A dirty old blow dryer became my BFF to move the already fast drying chalk paint along a little faster.

I used my Silhouette for the letters.

I will be adding some rusty metal, probably in the form of barbed wire, but that part didn't happen before it needed to be gifted or photographed.

A little reminder for #1 son to hang in his office.

The real gift was from his father - the last name, not the sign.

Linking my son's sign gift too:
Make it pretty Monday @TheDedicatedHouse
Tweak it Tuesday @CozyLittleHouse 
The Scoop @CedarHillRanch
Time to Sparkle @TheGunnySack 
Creative Inspirations @EmbracingChange
Project Inspired @CupcakesandCrinoline 
Tutorials & Tips @HomeStoriesAtoZ 
Make the Scene @AlderberryHill 
Craft-o-Maniac Monday 
Budget Decorating Party @CreativeCainCabin 
Show & Share @SouthernLovely 
Wildly Original Party @IGottaCreate 
Thursdays are Your Days @52Mantels 
Made You Look @MadeInADay 
Party Time @36thAvenue 
Tutorials, Tips & Tidbits @StoneGable 
Under $100 Link Party @BeyondThePicketFence 
Open House Party @NoMinimalistHere

Our Old Building

In keeping with my apparent theme for April of avoiding my dining room redo, here is another 'Tour de Distraction'.  Our old building.

Some of you know that a few years ago I bought an old building to renovate.

Saying I bought it is accurate, saying I'm renovating it makes my nose grow.
Gotta give credit to Brawn and the boys for 90% of the manual labor.  Ok.... 95%.

Before & During

The building is in a great location on a main street and it has a view of a lake out the back.

It has a gutted top floor.  We did this, and enjoyed every minute of it...till clean up.

Many of you might covet this vintage wallpaper.  I am not one of those.
I repeat....
I AM NOT ONE OF THOSE.
YES I'M YELLING THAT.  Sorry.

I did however rescue the old Kelvinator stove.  It's in good shape, just dirty.

Doesn't the sight of that in black and white make you feel a bit Betty Crocker-ish?

Lights....
It came with old lights.  The dirt was a vintage bonus. 

These sconces hang on the main floor above the barber work station.

The upstairs living quarters had these lights and this ugly faux ceiling.  One of those two is gone.  

Put your money on the ceiling.

Three schoolhouse lights hang over where the barber chairs were.  We will reuse them. I am willing to bet that the dust on top of these lights is as old as the building.

There is a covered stoop where you enter the main floor or stairs to go to the living space above.  The outside entry floor is covered with these tiles.  I think with a good cleaning they will look nice.  I like the colors.

A very large, shallow cabinet, just big enough for hair care products, is along one wall.  It will either be repurposed and used in the upstairs apartment, or it will come home with me to replace where the barber shop sign I made hangs in our master bath.  

This barber sign IS going to the new bathroom in the old building.  

Eventually.

When we have a bathroom somewhere in the old building.

Also in the master bath is the antique ceramic scissor sterilizer.  Say that fast 3 times.

 And the old scissors.

The store front currently houses a photography display - it's a regular winter wonderland.  

Still.  

In April.  

I have to get up there and remove the melted snowman heads.  

Or maybe not, the weather man is predicting 6 - 12 inches of snow for us today.

The middle of April.  Yuck.

The front has come a long way since these guys helped dad hold windows in place.  Brawn came back two hours later to find them still holding the window.  

Just kidding!!!  

If you look at the reflection in the glass it looks like R is wearing a lampshade on his head and has a thick black mustache.  Neither are true.  #3 does however have a dark beard and is sporting a beanie on his noggin.  He sort of looks like he's from Duck Dynasty.  My other son is doing a pretty good mime imitation huh?

So this spring, in addition to hopefully getting the never ending dining room redo done, we will also be putting the upstairs of this building back together.

The main floor will have to wait, because there is lots of strumming going on in there.....

The main floor hosts the main attraction - #3's band.  (Check out that awesome original tile floor!).

So either #3 or me has to start making better use of the building so one or both of us can put some green backs in this.....

Giant Yardstick

So last week I posted the dining room table redo and the partial dining room chair redo's.

Then before that I didn't feel like working on the table or chairs so I posted a tour of a guest bathroom as a distraction.

That's sort of what is going on today.......... a distraction.  I see a pattern.

So I'mma-gonna post about something else I made to distract me from EVER completing the dining room.

Enter the giant yardstick project.  (Thank goodness the one my mom used to whack my hinder with wasn't this size!)

You've seen them on the internet, but I didn't follow a specific tutorial so no credit is given.  If you made one and posted a picture, thanks - that's where I got the idea.

I start crafts at night, so you'll have to deal with the photo lighting

Making lines is not rocket science for most people, but for me it is.

Because I had to measure on the measure.  Math.  Yuck.

Then after I made my marks and painted the numbers all pretty, I realized that I hadn't painted the whole thing yet, or stained it.  I didn't even know which I would do.

Einstein I'm not.

So I painted it and re-marked the marks. 

And ended up with this......

The measuring stick was such a novelty, a certain 5 year old even marked the height of his playmates on it!

Those two cuties in the pictures are worth all the number calculations my math challenged brain ever had to calculate.

 I did not take these photos, but I'm claiming them anyhow.

My next distraction from completing the dining room might be the impromptu photo tour I did of my son's house.

Wonder what my daughter in law thinks? Wouldn't you love me for a mother in law?  Sneak in and take photos unannounced and then put them on the internet? 

Linking up Mr. Jumbo to:
The Scoop @CraftyTexasGirls
Make it Pretty @TheDedicatedHouse
Friday Free For All @FiveDays5Ways
The Inspiration Gallery @CraftyScrappyHappy
Creative Inspirations Party @EmbracingChange
Open House Party @NoMinimalistHere
Tutorials Tips & Tidbits @StoneGable
Under $100 @BeyondThePicketFence
Wildly Original Party@IGottaCreate 
Show & Share @SouthernLovely
Thursdays are Your Days @52Mantels
Pinworthy Projects @JustUsFour 
That DIY Party @DIYShowoff

Coming Soon to a Table near Me....

Waiting for wax

Chairs have been painted.  Chalk paint.

Painted again.  Chalk paint.

And yet parts again.  Chalk paint.

They are getting ready to join the table.

Lonely table waiting for chairs

 
From the top of their carved chair backs to the bottom of their ribbed paws...
all six have been rubbed with a wash of oil stain over the chalk paint.

And every one of the lovely, but hated nooks and crannies has had the pleasure of my company.

Lonely chair waiting for others to be waxed

The seat cushions have been leather-ed. 

And one....

one brave chair has been waxed.

Yes blogging buddies, that can only mean one thing........

I STILL HAVE  5 MORE FREAKING CHAIRS TO WAX.  (If they ever let me out of the asylum).

The fabric for the backs is here. 

Purchased in the paint department.  Drop cloth - lying in wait to become one with the chairs.

Before

And you my friends.  I rely on you all to remind me that I never....

ever....

EVERRRRRRR......

 want to redo six chairs, EVER... ever... again.

I will die a happy woman to never paint or wax another chair.  EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.