Tongue In Cheek Tuesday, on Monday

Seems all around the land it's the month of resolutions.
I've made a few in my day, and I only remember two that I ever kept.
To gain weight because I was looking a little thin.
In a dream. 
Once.
OK, no that never happened, the dream or that resolution.  So sad.

The real resolution took place in January of 2012.  For a few months prior I was cleaning out and decluttering.  Then I discovered blogging and realized all the stuff I was cleaning out were treasures that I just needed to learn to display properly. (See my previous post about the metal ware on my mantel).

There is nothing fashionable about storing treasures in a box.  Instead, I have now filled the garage with junk I can look at every freaking day, and realized for me, what a silly resolution decluttering was to begin with.

The resolve for '12 was to use up all my shampoos and conditioners before I bought anything new to try.  Nothing earth shattering or life altering but I wanted to make a difference in my own bathroom, which is where I contemplate all my earth shattering and life altering concepts.   

 I learned that apparently I like to try new shampoos that come out, you know so I can achieve those long silky locks like the hair models.  You would think after attempting that - for what appears to be a 10 year stockpile of bottles - I'd get the hint... "BLISS HONEY... IT AIN'T WORKING FOR 'YA".   Not one of those bottles turned me into a young blonde with shiny long straight tresses.  WTH?  Never mind that I'm brunette.

Only thing that happened was I got 10 years older and my hair started to go gray.  For all I know one of those shampoos is what caused those two things to happen in the first place.  

I realize you would not have thought me a shampoo hoarder.  Proves you can't judge a woman by her hair book by its cover.  How could I know I needed to reform when I didn't even know I was sick till I accepted it was taking more than a couple months to use them all up.

But I kept to the resolution, in fact I'm still working on it.  There are a few almost gone ones yet to finish off, and I spotted some full ones in this antique bathroom cabinet lying in wait.

Bath & Body Works good Smelling Vanilla Sugar & VO5.
Highlighted with Bliss Ranch's color choice of the year "Greige"

Reflecting on the past year of de-shampooing I have made some

 discoveries and observations.....

1.  The cheap crap worked as good as the expensive stuff.  (Hear that Molton Brown!  Or is that Alton Brown?  One is from the food network.)
2.  The expensive stuff looks more fancy schmancy in my bathroom shower.
3.  No one sees my bathroom shower.
4.  I am thankful no one sees my bathroom shower.

Top half of a shampoo hoarders shower

 5.  I don't like shampoos that come in a flip top tube.  You can't get the goo out after the tube takes on air, and if you stand it on end to better enable goo exit you better be darn sure the cap is on tight or your goo ends up seeping out all over making a gooey shampoo shower puddle.  That is IF you can even make the flip top lid shut right and stand up!

More hated flip tops.  *Bliss Ranch highlighted in color of the year Emerald Green

6.  Some shampoo smells better than others.
7.  No one notices that unless their nose is in my hair.
8.  I go no where that it's necessary for someone's nose to be in my hair.
9.  The only one that it matters too how my shampoo smells is me.
10.  I can only smell my shampoo while I am in the shower.
11.  The smell only matters till I get out and put in mousse, add hair spray or put on perfume.

12.  And what about sample sizes lifted from hotels to send with my kids to camp?
13.  I have no kids going to camp anymore.

14. The only cure for the frizzies caused by summer humidity, is sub zero Winter temps.  There is no shampoo-conditioner combo that can fix it or mimic Winter and there is no frizz in Minnesota in January and no sub zero temps in July.
15.  I had a disproportionate amount of shampoos to conditioners left.  Is that normal?

And last of utmost importance:
16.  If you wash and condition your hair but decide you don't have to leave the house so why bother to dry and style it, without a doubt that is the day the FedEX or UPS man will ring the bell.  
Every. Single. Time.
And he knows you're in there.


So my resolution for 2013 is to blow dry and style my hair after each shower.  Maybe the UPS man will be so captivated by my fabulous hair that he won't notice I'm still in my jammies at 2:00 in the afternoon.

If he arrives after 3:00 I make someone else answer the door.

Want to poke fun at yourself?  Let one of us know you want to join in for Tongue in Cheek Tuesday, which happens every month, (maybe), on Tuesday, (but sometimes not).  My last/first Tongue in Cheek Tuesday was on a Thursday.  Who cares right?

Kirb Appeal

Bliss Ranch

Silo Hill Farm

Melleywoods Mansion

Simply Vintageous

White Spray Paint

What We Keep
Corn In My Coffeepot
The Backyard Bungalow  
Buffalo Roam
Crows Feet Chic

A Mantel of Aluminum

Don't fall over but yes I accomplished a post two days in a row.  Don't get used to it either. 
Since I hauled out the box of tin just yesterday this is a follow-up for what I did with the stuff.

Half the box of stuff is now on my mantel.  The mantel that for the past three weeks had nothing but dust on it.  Don't worry, the dust is still there, I didn't do anything drastic like clean it it off.

The letter holder is now displaying my mom's Primer, from 1927.  For you youngsters, a primer is a book to learn reading.  It's really worn and faded and I love it.

BBQ tongs.  Really looooong ones.  Used for short people to reach farther.  Like to hang a galvanized letter "R" on the mantel.

One mantel down, two to go.  If I get really ambitious I might do the master bedroom mantel for Valentines Day.  But probably not.

Hammered Aluminum Collection

About an hour ago I read a post over at EclecticallyVintage about Kelly's glass collection, or addiction depending on how you view your junk habit.  She called it "collectingitis".  At the end she asked what we collect. 

Well I have more than enough junk put away, correction.... collections, because I view my junk as part collection and part addiction.  No matter how you combine those two words it comes out as a 'tion' at the end.

Kelly's question got me thinking, what do I have I might want to reincorporate in my decorating, since a lot of my 'tions' have been banished to darkness for many years when they just seemed like clutter.   Which of course was well before blogging affirmed that my junk is in fact treasures.  Right?

I went to the depths of helll, AKA the storage under the stairs, and I pulled out this box of vintage hammered aluminum.

I spread it out and counted..... 27 pieces of silvery metal ware. 

With awesome detailed handles.

My favorite handles are like the one below.

I recall having this little letter holder on my desk for a while, then on the table holding napkins. 

So now what should I do with all this stuff?  How would you display it?  I actually think there might be another small box of it under the stairs.  I do have a very naked mantel.  Hmmmm?

If that pile of junk is still on the table when Brawn comes home, I'm blaming Kelly.

Yardstick Table

This yardstick table was originally posted over at the terrific ReFreshReStyle with Debbie, so you might remember seeing it before.  But when 'ya do a guest post it feels wrong to link up your own project to a party when your project is at someone elses house.  So I'm bringing my table home.

Months worth of collecting

When ever I see a yardstick my ears hear the slap of it hitting my rear end.

My mom was a gentle lady.  I was a brat.  One of my first posts was about her and the Christmas cactus she left me.

She kept her yardstick by the refrigerator.  Was it just a convenient spot to store it or did she keep it there so when I came by she could quickly grab it and smack me on my butt?

I will never know.  A mark was never left on my azzz and I don't remember ever crying, but I knew I was being a serious brat if the yardstick came out.
 

I picked up this little table at an estate sale in July for $10 bucks.

I didn't need it.  Didn't have a place for it, and didn't like it's blonde finish.

It sat in the garage till October when I put it in my entry decorated with a dangling eye ball in a birds beak for Halloween.

Nearby in an umbrella stand was the stock pile of yardsticks I have been collecting for a project.  When the two were in close proximity to each other I made the connection - the lightbulb came on - and I knew they would become one.

There is no tutorial for this.  The yardsticks were attached with nails, the edge was cut off and a router was used to finish it.  I used CeCe Caldwell Traverse City Cherry with a wash of Virginia Chestnut Brown, which I also painted the top edge with.

Perhaps the key to obtaining this finish was painting, sanding, waxing, and distressing while in my jammies.

The distressing was followed with dark wax and I left the hardware as is.

I only wish I still had that old yardstick of my mom's.  It would be on this table top.

I also hit part of the mirror with some of the red.  I ran the brush over lightly and wiped it back.  I can't say how long this table will stay in this spot, but the warm tones are nice for this time of year.

*Update:  As of January the table is still there, however the glass candle globe didn't make it.  It was pretty easy to hit as you fumble in the dark for that light-switch.  Just saying.....

Since the reason I reposted was so I could link, here it goes:

Funky Junk Interiors Saturday Nite Special - Yardsticks
Made You Look Linky @MadeInADay
Creative Inspirations Link Party @EmbracingChange
Open House Party @NoMinimalistHere
Under $100 Linky @BeyondThePicketFence
Party time @ThreeMangoSeeds
What's in the gunny sack @TheGunnySack
Make The Scene Monday @AlderberryHill
Newbie Party & Graduates @DebbieDoos
Crafty Texas Girls Cowgirl Up Party
All Star Block Party @FullCircleCreations
Party Time @Cupcakes&Crinoline 
Project Parade @DIY Show Off 
Silver Pennies Sunday @FindingSilverPennies 

The yardstick table proudly featured here:
All Star Block Party @FullCircleCreations 
Silver Pennies Sunday Party @SilverPennies
It's Party Time @ThreeMangoSeeds & Friends
Make the Scene Monday @AlderberryHill
The DIY Party @DIYShowOff 
What's in the Gunny Sack with Tonia @TheGunnySack 
Creative Inspirations Link Party @EmbracingChange 
Made U Look @MadeInADay

Party Features so I can come out of the corner

Back when decorated trees sprouted out of peoples houses I was part of a link party called 'Tis The Season' with 8 other blogs.  Thanks to Stacey at EmbracingChange for inviting me to be part of it.  The "season" seems like eons ago for me.  I was the last hostess - ending in January - and I was on top of reading the party links, but getting a post done with the features.... not so much on top of that part.

Just sit me in the corner with the cone of shame.

Why did it take so long, you ask?  Because I tend to want to feature every. single. link. so I put it off as that's not how these link parties work.  Dammitanyhow.

Let me refresh your memory on what you were to link..... I wanted to see where you were a year ago at this time, or your first post ever.  First I had 22 selected.  Then I whittled away to 15.

This is why I will never be good at hosting link parties.  So I did eenie-meenie-miney-mo.

To start, how about a concrete walkway that has botanical leaf imprints in it.  A year ago ThisGreenHouse was documenting their new home progress... and pouring lots of cement!

And I remember the next one from last year - the post responsible for my summer hunt for futon frames.  Susan at HomeRoad made a bench out of the wood from a futon.  People usually can't even give those things away at garage sales, where are they now that I'm looking for one? 

Last year this time, OurPinterestingFamily was busy installing a bead board ceiling in their bathroom.  Curses.... now I want some on my bathroom ceiling too. 

On Manor Drive linked her first post of January 2013.  Emphasis on first post.  She is a new blogger and has set out her goals as DIY resolutions.  I'm pretty sure she'll get those missing door handles put on, but what I am looking forward to is goal #10 - create a WOman cave for herself. 

This next link was the one feature that was a no brainer for me to pick.  I knew right away I was ordering some of the paint and giving it a try on the craigslist dining room chairs I picked up in November.  Because, you know, I'm all about trying what I see from all of you.

Jean at TheBackYardBungalow  used fabric spray paint to transform this chair.  Hopefully soon you will see a chair transformation at Bliss Ranch too.

2012 had Linda at ItsyBitsandPieces redoing an entry way.  Go see the before and how they gave the existing waiscotting the look of a built in.  Linda is a super star, and one of the two bloggers to have actually met the elusive Bliss.  I really do exist.

And because I really do exist, before blogging I gave away a table that looked just like the one Laura at TopThisTopThat redid.  Now I want it back. 

You linked some "mayhem", "pearls" of wisdom, a "heart"felt tribute of remembrance and a bit of "monkey" business.  A beautiful door headboard, a chalked door, a pine headboard makeover and a dresser redoux from two bloggers who always inspire me. 

And lastly there was this...........

The first ever photo upload from Ranger911 ..... misspelled.  Because in bogging we have to be abe to augh at ourseves, which in turn teaches us to check spellling for a missing "L".

Lampwork Bead Cake Testers

Beads by Lampwork Artist Leese

I am going to introduce you to one of my beautiful daughters.  Yup, I'm actually putting a photo of one of my kids on my blog.  Don't stalk her.  I will hunt you down.

This is the same daughter who made some signs at Christmas and decided to sew a little elf for the little girl she was a nanny for while at college.  She has a kiln and makes pottery.  She is a graphic designer who works in advertising and on a variety of web sites.

She is someone who I refer to as artistic. 

But don't let that sweet face fool you, she's the same young woman who rolls her eyes at me if I ask for computer help, and she seldom reads my blog.  But she likes to bake.

Professional Eye Roller

Today she made cupcakes.  Lemon filled.  Cream cheese frosting.

A few years ago, Beth being a starving college girl, had to come up with a way to put gas in her car and gifts under the tree.

So she made this glass beaded beauty.......

And started selling them.

It's a jeweled cake tester, you know... something you poke into cakes instead of tooth picks to see if a cake is done.  But these aren't tacky little trinkets, they are true works of art made with top quality goods - Czech glass beads, Tibetan silver spacers and you can't buy the stainless steel at the craft store.  One of a kind gifts.

Cake Testers made with Fire Agates & Glass Beads

Beth found a lampwork bead artist on the East Coast who makes the most beautiful beads.  Lampwork beads are made by using long thin glass rods put into a flame then the glass melts as you spin it.  (That's the simplified version of how it's done).

There is a real art to it - just like glass blowing - and each bead is unique and original.

The artists name is Leese and her beads are stunning.......

In all colors and shapes.  Blues, reds, metallics, pinks, golds... each bead prettier than the one before.

Beth takes whatever beads suit her mood and turns them into her own works of art as a functional one of a kind kitchen gadget.  I keep mine in the knife block where it's handy.  She used it on those cupcakes today to make sure they were done.

Cake Tester By One 30 One Design using Glass By Leese Beads

When Beth first found Leese I was addicted.  I checked every day to see what new beads she had.  Jewelry crafters use Leese's beads for their custom jewelry.
 

Beth also has other lampwork artists that she gets some beads from.  Those beads are pretty too, but nothing matches the ones that Leese creates.  (Of course I think all the cake testers turn out pretty no matter whose beads she uses).  Beth also uses faceted agates on some of her cake testers, those are really popular.

Variety of Cake Testers

Beth can use any kind of bead really.  She has made some custom ones out of grandmothers sentimental baubles; she made a set of 8 for some airline stewardesses with travel charms; one lady orders them and tucks them in home made aprons and baking gift baskets for bridal gifts.

I like to give them as baby shower gifts for all the birthday cakes that new mom is sure to be making.  And I always know it's a gift the recipient won't receive from anyone else.

Beth also goes through a few pink ones in October......

If you want to see more of Leese's beads you can go here, here or here.  Tell her Beth's mom formally known as her stalker, sent you. 

All Glass Beads

Beth and One 30 One Designs, have a blog page {here} that she uses as a store front, and an Etsy Shop as well.  Keep a cake tester in mind next time you are stumped what to give your BFF for her birthday.  They look cute with one of those fancy bakery cupcakes.

And the lemon cupcakes?  Lemon poppyseed, with lemon curd filling and lemon cream cheese frosting...... one of them is calling my name.