The Tabled Table, Gets Topped

Remember that dining room redo that started back in February?

No?  That's alright-ie you can click to read about it if you want.
Basically the room got painted and forgot about.

But that wasn't as long ago as the table was started.

The plain pine boards in their planning stage.

The dining room table got tabled back in November.
The new one to be bigger... badder than the pine one it was replacing.

I picked up some chairs on craigslist to redo.  Because a couple of those fabric ones had ripped seats.

The march of the chairs

Thanksgiving came and went.  Christmas came and went.
Then we painted the dining room walls in February.

Things were looking up in the redo area.

Then I lost my vision.

Back side of the new table top

The chairs sat, and we sat on them.
The new table top entered the room half done where it stayed.
It stayed long enough that people complimented us on the new table, believing that was the finished product.

The top got burned before the dark stain base went on

 It stayed long enough in it's dark way that when the new finish was done I myself had to get used to it.

Table just lying in wait

This table is Brawn's baby.  I can't take credit for it.
In a rare turn of events he described to me what he wanted and I painted.

And painted again because I got it wrong.  I didn't read his mind like I expect him to do when he is working on something for me.

The table ended up with a coat of ASCP in Pure White.

Brawn patiently scraping with a razor blade

 He and #2 daughter did the distressing with a razor blade.

Then I did some waxing and sanding till he was pleased.
Yes I waxed the top of the table in a high traffic area.  It's hard, and buffed, and turned out wonderful.

Nice-old-worn-barnboard-looking.
Just like Brawn had in mind.

The Dining Room Reveal..... it's coming.......soon.....

Latte Bottle turned Soap Dispenser

While on my month long quest to avoid manual labor in my dining room redo, I decided I needed my dish soap in a glass jar, or bottle or whatever besides what it was in. 

I didn't want the regular pump from a soap bottle, I wanted the big 'ol thing from my peeling metal soap dispenser.

So I assembled the parts: 
A yucky Gingerbread latte beverage from December
The old soap pump
Glass of mostly gone ice tea
Miscellaneous glass jars that were sitting there
And a sippy cup. 

Because when taking a picture, why on earth spend the extra second it takes to move all that junk out of the way?

Don't anyone get too excited over this project, or the tutorial I am about to give you.

Soap Dispenser from glass bottle - tutorial if you need it

Try to drink the Gingerbread latte because you don't want to waste it.  It has been there since December, someone might want it.

Take the metal bottle lid, get a screw driver and pound holes in it till it looks like the old soap pump top will fit in there firmly.  

Bonus!... the bottle lid fits right inside the neck of the pump, it doesn't show, it fits tight.

Cut the plastic straw part three different times before you get it right.  That took the longest and each time I thought I had it right I put it in the soap then had to take it out and drip dish soap all over.

Screw the metal lid with the old pump top on the jar.  I got lucky - it fits perfect.

Wash dishes.

While the rest of the blog world is talking about Spring and what project to start on and link up, or that your flowers are coming up, all that does is make me want to put snow down your pants.  

The below self explanatory photos tell you why I'm a bit bitter.

My view as I shower

View as I leave to go shopping before the blizzard comes tomorrow

I should keep driving west till I find sun and warmth

And just in case you can't figure this out.... the view while I use my soap dispenser looks about the same out the kitchen window. Same white stuff, different side of the house.

Lazy Susan, and you shall have some pie...

mmmmm.... pie

Last week I went thrifting and occasional saling with the one friend who knows about this blog (Hi Dii).  I didn't get much at the occasional sales, if anything, but I did get a few things at our first stop, the thrift store.

I wasn't looking for mittens, kittens, or lazy Susans.

Don't be jealous of this big beauty, but do be envious of her girth.  Ms. Susan is a heavy 20" across.  She gets that from eating pie. 

You can laze a lot of goods on her top, 20" is a generous width.

Since I am still avoiding my dining room redo, I worked on this project by the dark of night.  I think I'm an owl, meow-l meow-l meow-l.  (Get it...the 3 Little kittens?)

I wanted a barrel-top-look so when Brawn seemed comfortable with no intention of moving, I asked if he would router some grooves in the top.  I wasn't fussy about how wide or how far apart, just do it NOW.  Please and thank you.

And while you're out in the pigstye garage, find a couple old handles, I don't care what they look like either.*

*I really did care and these were not what I envisioned but didn't think I should be too picky as I was being pretty bossy and he was clearly engrossed in Duck Dynasty.

I summoned the troops..... CeCe Caldwell, Annie Sloan and La Craie.  The ladies stepped forward and for this project two sample pots were used as well as some pure white from Annie.  Letters courtesy of my Cameo Silhouette.

The inspiration for the wording shall not be revealed. The reason for that is I preferred the original source and I don't want you to say to yourself, "self..... Bliss's rendition looks nothing like that".  But if you want to stop over at MissFlibbertigibbet's and poke around, look for a really cool pie sign.

I had to go back and add all the white on the letters because I wasn't liking them without.  I'll remember that next time.  

When I was all done, this sad little kitten-owl had no pie.  

Microwave Brownie In a Cup from No. 2 Pencil.

But do not fear, I just clicked to the Bliss Ranch Pinterest boards for a quick dessert for one. 

The not so Lazy Susan is linked at:
Power of Pinterest Party @DebbieDoos &FoxHollowCottage
Wow Us Wednesdays @SavvySouthernStyle 
Pinworthy Projects @JustUsFour
MadeULook #64 @MadeInADay
Wildly Original Party @ IGottaCreate
Under $100 Link Party @BeyondThePicketFence
 Transformation Thursday @TheShabbyCreekCottage 
 Tutorials, Tips & Tidbits @ StoneGable 
Be Inspired @Common Ground 
Inspiration Gallery @CraftyScrappyHappy  and friends
Freedom Fridays @MyTurnForUs 
Overflowing With Creativity @ItsOverflowing 
Junking With Joe @ TheCottageMarket 
Sunday Showoff @TwigStudios
Show & Tell @BeDifferentActNormal 
That DIY Party @DIYShowoff 
Make the Scene Monday @AlderberryHill 
It's Party Time @ThreeMangoSeeds 
Tuesdays The Scoop @CraftyTexasGirls 
Make it Pretty Monday @TheDedicatedHouse 
Tweak it Tuesday @CozyLittleHouse 
Time to Sparkle @The Gunny Sack 
Creatively Tuesday @The Rustic Pig  
Tuesdays Treasures @MyUncommonSliceOfSuburbia 
Adorned From Above Wednesday Blog Hop with Suzan @SimplyVintageous 
Transformation Tuesday @TheIronstoneNest
Open House Party @NoMinimalistHere 
Creative Inspirations @EmbracingChange
Thursdays are Your Days @52Mantels 
It's a Party @DIYByDesign



Not so Lazy Susan featured at:

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Tongue in Cheek Tuesday and Adam

Coach, Gucci, Walmart and Penney's

The Once a Month
Tongue-in-cheek Tuesday presents..... 

The Junk in Your Trunk

Or purse, glovebox, drawers, what-evah and where-evah the location of your junk might be

The other ladies do all the work, I just show up once a month.

 

I chose the junk in my purse.  Really Bliss?

I like black purses and I cannot lie. 

This post might get me on one of those sites where they make fun of boring blogs. 

As I write I'm wondering why I didn't pick one of my piles of cool DIY junk. 

4 of the 10 black purses I just found out I own

The contents of my purse are not very exciting and honestly neither is this post.
My purse is more like a traveling file cabinet.

Booorrr-ing.

And I never realized I was a black purse hoarder till I counted them for this post.

The three T's are in the zipper.  Tampons, Tylenol and Tissues.

My traveling file cabinet is also used as a briefcase, but there wasn't as much paper as usual inside.  No agendas or minutes from meetings.  I cleaned those out a couple weeks ago.  Oddly this time I didn't find one piece of chewed gum wadded up in a scrap of something.

I rarely clean out my purse and if stuff goes in it could be months before it again sees the light of day. That's bad if I put something important inside, like appointment reminders.

There were 3 appointment reminders in there - orthodontist, dentist and doc.
"Don't worry son, you'll get there, I've cleaned out my purse in the knick of time"!

18 receipts plus 3 gas, 2 McDonalds, and 3 Sherwin Williams.

If you are a mugger or a purse snatcher, I'm your girl.

**If you have ever been mugged or had your purse snatched I do NOT think it's funny and would gladly shoot the bast-ards.   

12 gift cards, $287 in bills plus a $1.00 winning scratch off a friend gave me at Christmas

My friends refer to my purse as the black hole or the magic purse.  They would swear on a stack of Bibles that I dig and shuffle, taking out stacks of papers while declaring I don't think I have any cash, only to magically pull out greenbacks with either Ulysses S. Grant or my BFF Mr. Franklin.

Love these guys

Cars go from zero to 100 in a matter of seconds.
I've been known to go from zero to several hundred in the time it takes a waitress to bring the bill.

Have you ever seen more boring piles in a mom purse ?

Ulysses and Ben come along for important things like garage sales and thrift stores.
Taco Bell.
Rogue latte's that jump into my hand.

And also because I don't know how to use an ATM card.

Costco just sucked out some Franklin's the day before these photos.

As I whittle down and organize the junk, notice this photo is upside down?

The Salted Nut Roll was for an emergency.
I did put it back in my purse but the emergency happened the same day.

I found 3 pairs of reading glasses in there.  Maybe that's normal?  If you're an alien or a potato.

And can anyone tell me when I need a pen why I can't find one in the magic purse?
I dumped out 5.

What goes back in

Three packs of gum, a tin of mints and a Ricola throat drop all went back in as did one pair of glasses, 2 pens and Adam.

Meet Adam.  Do you know why Adam is in my magic purse?  Me either.  I put him back in because I don't know what else to do with him.

Maybe Adam is why I had three pairs of reading glasses in there?  Now that I mention it, I've had the date right every day this month.  Oh wait... Adam is January.  I better check who is February and March.

And the coin?  I put it in the savings account for a trip to the Caribbean.

 My oldest remarked I must not plan on going very far, like only the next town.

 I have lots more room without that big 'ol bulky Nut Roll in there.  Thank God it's gone.

If you like you can read my 1st Tongue in Cheek Tuesday, that happened on a Thursday, and the 2nd TICT that happend on a Monday.  And really, our February TICT is in March.  No rules!

Link up Buttercup...  you don't have to link back, you can pirate the green TICT button at the top if you want to include it in your post, but you don't have too.  Make fun of yourself and your junk shows up on all 5 of blogs.  We'll be doing junky shout outs after the party closes Sunday.

Bookmark Tongue in Cheek Tuesday

While all of blog land is shedding pounds, eating healthy, re-doing crafting rooms and WOman caves, I've been sitting on my rear-end seemingly doing nothing but making every fat laden main course and delicious looking dessert on my Pinterest boards.

I've cleaned out some kitchen drawers and rearranged some messy piles of stuff, but it's not anything picture worthy.

I started a dining room redo in February.  And then abandoned a dining room redo.

Where is Spring?!?!?  I'm putting all my hopes and crafting dreams in the belief that once I don't have to look at snow I'll want to create.

Last Fall my son wanted some book marks.  Before I was a blogger I would of just ripped a piece of paper out of something for him, maybe bought a trendy one at WalMart or taught him how to fold over the page corner.  Taboo, I know. 

Rusty old razor blade is a must have

But those are not good enough anymore when your mom blogs.  No siree.

You have to take to the internet and find out what the other blog moms are doing for their kids' book marks.  There are some really cute ones out there, but I didn't want him to get beat up.  (I couldn't find the original inspiration, but this one is pretty close at Green Paper).

There are also more awesome versions of the ones I made, but honestly I wasn't *THAT* into what they looked like.

I picked up these old Readers Digest books in a free bin.  I have lots of them that belonged to my parents, but I wasn't about to slice those up.  Free ones I'm not emotionally attached too are fine.

The process was very simple;
Razor blade the spine off, remove the fabric part of the spine from the book board, and Mod Podge it on to some card stock.  The only embellishing I did was with an old leather boot lace cut to pieces for the top.

The Podge as it dries

Let it dry.  Mine seemed to take forever - I must of used too much Podge.  I am not a Mod Podge Queen like Ms. Doos, I need her to give me lessons.  If it takes over a week to dry does that mean I used too much?

Flatten them under a heavy book.  If you try to do this before they dry they will stick. Duh.

A week of watching glue dry is a good way to develop patience, so don't use so much Mod Podge.

Old leather boot laces become the top tassel

Not only did my son like how they turned out, his older sister asked if she could have one too.  Completely free, unless you count the tiny bit of Mod Podge.  (I do question that *tiny bit* part).

I reused the spineless books too, they still sit in this same location except the table now looks like this.....

You can click over if you would like to see the table transformation.

Now that you have a bookmark semi-tutorial, you can "bookmark" next Tuesday as the third month of Tongue in Cheek Tuesday.

 

TICT has been revamped to debut as a once a month link party, but the rules are still lax, I mean really there are no rules.  We found out in February that lots of wonderful bloggers are pretty funny and would love to join in, but a little button only holds so many names.

Danni our design guru makes all the buttons, (insert clapping here) and notice she went with green for March.  (I wasn't sure she was ever going to run out of St. Patricks Day crafts).

Danni also posted all the information about Tongue in Cheek Tuesday, which I am going to pirate half of here, I mean seriously why should I reinvent the wheel right?

From Silo Hill Farm:

 I'm inviting all of my readers to join in a little fun next week.  The last two were so much fun, and so many people expressed interest in joining us, we've decided to turn it into a once a month link party.  Link on 1, be seen on all 5.  It's all in good fun and it's about making fun of ourselves.

The topic..... we're going to dish out some dirt, our own!  We're going to be sharing where we keep our junk.  We don't really have any rules, like you have to post a button or you have to follow us or any jumping through hoops.  Of course we'd love it if you did those things, (especially jumping through hoops - if you do that include a picture) but really we don't take ourselves too seriously.

If you want to join in we'd love to have you.  Just write up a post poking fun at your junkiest area and link it up at any of the following blogs on Tuesday March 12th.

Everyone's got a little Junk in their trucks, 

(or purse, or corner, or drawer, or on a table, or.....)  come share yours.

Kirb Appeal

Bliss Ranch

Silo Hill Farm

Mellywood's Mansion

Simply Vintageous....by Suzan

   


So there 'ya have it.  A bookmark to bookmark next Tuesday.  For me the problem will be narrowing down what trunk of junk I'm gonna make fun of myself about!

Linking up to Christina at IGottaCreate and the Wildly Original Party
Inspiration Gallery @CraftyScrappyHappy
Catch as Catch Can @MyRepurposedLife
Inspired Creations @EmbracingChange 
Under $100 Link Party @BeyondThePicketFence 
Saturday Night Special "Crafts" @Funky Junk Interiors